Coming Clean
by rosemarried
Summary: Albus is about to tell his best friend, Gellert Grindewald, his biggest secret; how will he react? Will he still be his friend or, Albus doesn't dare even hope, more?


**For The Confession Competition by thegoodgirldoll and 5, 10, 20, 50, 75, 100 Fandoms by Shermione (sorry if I spelled that wrong), this is Coming Clean. This has been finished for a while, so I apologize to both of you for not having this up sooner. Shermione (I still get the feeling I'm spelling this wrong) I have two others finished that should be up today. **

**That out of the way, enjoy and review! This is my first Dumbledore/Gridewald, so sorry if it sucks. I hope the language doesn't seem off, I tried to make it more appropriate to the times, which I believe is somewhere in the 1890's to 1930's, which is a big range so it's hard to pin it down. So, again, sorry if I got something wrong. Okay, I'm done talking. You can go read now. **

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Albus was feeling... Unsettled.

It wasn't a normal feeling for Albus. He was the top of his class, possibly the whole school, and had plenty of self confidence. He never worried about school work or popularity or friends. Frankly, he could be perfectly happy without popularity or friends, but people seemed to flock to him anyways. He wasn't afraid very often. He could remember only a handful of times in his life: when Ariana had been terrorized, the first time she lost control of her magic, of his father after he had beaten those muggle boys. Never had he ever been scared of someone discovering his secrets though. Never.

Until now, that was. What would Gellert say, what would he do, if he knew? Who he was, what he was, what he felt, it wasn't natural. He knew he shouldn't think these sorts of thoughts, but he couldn't help it. He had tried to control them but he couldn't.

He had heard of people like him before now that he thought of it. Nobody really seemed to think much of it. Sure, they thought it was strange that someone could feel that way, but it wasn't frowned upon except by Muggle borns who spouted some nonsense about a "Bible" and "God", whatever those were. Gellert wasn't Muggle born, though. He was a pureblood. So why would he have anything bad to say? He wouldn't, of course he wouldn't. They were friends.

Albus gulped. Well, they were now. Albus felt a bit different than he was sure Gellert did. Gellert was his friend, a good friend, one of the only people who could match him intellectually. But nothing else.

But that was of no matter. He couldn't keep something like this from him, he just couldn't. It wouldn't be right or fair. He'd just have to tell him, and to hell with what he thought afterwards! Well maybe not to hell, but he'd certainly get over it quickly... Hopefully.

Albus took a deep calming breath and sat down at his desk to write a quick note.

,

I have something of importance to tell you. Would you care to meet somewhere private?

Albus

He walked over to the perch where his pheonix Fawks sat, who he had trained to carry letters the same as an owl. Albus held out the note and a finger for him to perch on and Fawks flew over to him, ruffling his brilliant golden plumage. He attached the rolled up note to his leg and held him out to the open window. Fawks flew down the road and turned down the street where he knew Gellert was staying with his great aunt, Bathilda Bagshot. Albus resumed his pacing across the floor, worried. Fawks came back fairly quickly, seeing as it was a short note and not a very long distance to fly.

"That's a good bird." Albus said encouragingly as Fawks flew back in and landed on his outstretched fingers. He fumbled with the note momentarily before managing to detach it from Fawks. Gellert always tied the knots so tight and complex, apparently afraid it would fall off and the bird wouldn't fetch it. He opened it and read it silently, mouthing the words to himself.

Albus,

We could meet at the graveyard gates, if you like? No ones ever there apart from Sundays, for whatever reason.

Gellert

Albus hurriedly scribbled a quick message on the back of Gellerts.

I'll see you in 10 minutes then.

Albus

Albus grabbed his jacket from his bedpost and rushed out of his room. He closed the door as softly as possible and tiptoed past his sister's room - he wasn't keen on waking her, as she was surely sleeping. It would undoubtably only cause unnecessary trouble for his mother.

At the bottom of the staircase, Albus ran into Aberforth - literally. Aberforth stumbled backwards a few steps.

"Watch where your going!" he said angrily. Albus extended a hand to help him up.

"I'm sorry, Aberforth, I didn't see you." he apologized. Aberforth swatted his hand aside.

"It doesn't matter." he grumbled. He pushed past him up the stairs. Albus almost reached out to stop him, ask him about his day or something of that nature in one of his frequent attempts to develop a relationship with his brother over the summer, but he thought better of it. He already knew how it would go - Aberforth would accuse him of poking into his business and start and argument with him, keeping him stuck here for at least 20 more minutes, and that was if they were lucky enough that their mother didn't here them and lecture them on causing so much noise in the house and how they couldn't be giving the neighbors more to gossip about than they already had. He only had 10 minutes, he had to get moving. He hurried across the kitchen to the door, hoping he wouldn't be stopped again, but no such luck.

"Albus?" came his mother's voice from the other side of the kitchen. "Are you going out?" Albus froze with his hand on the doorknob and turned around.

"Yes, Mother."

"Where?" Kendra inquired, wiping her hands on a towel hanging from the stove.

"The graveyard." he said. Kendra raised her eyebrows.

"The graveyard? Why, what reason do you have for going to that dreadful place?"

"I'm meeting Gellert." he said evasively. Kendra smiled understandingly.

"Ah, Gellert. Well, go on then. I don't want to make you late. But be sure to be home for supper now. You were nearly last time." Albus nodded, unsure what to think of the strange smile plastered on his mothers face. The paranoid part of him kept repeating, she knows, she knows, Merlin's beard she knows in the back of his head. He tried to ignore it, but it concerned him. What if she did know? Most likely, she was just glad to see him socializing. It wasn't something that came easy to him, talking to people his own age. No, he was much better with children. Shaking off these thoughts, he headed out the door without a backwards glance. He now only had 7 minutes to get to the gates, and he didn't want to keep Gellert waiting.

Albus jogged down to the end of his street, took a right and then a left before catching sight of the tiny chapel with a graveyard behind it, and a tall figure with messy blond hair in the distance. Albus's heart nearly stopped - there was no backing out now.

He slowed down to a walk to give himself time to catch his breath before he approached him. By the time he reached Gellert, his breathing was almost back to normal. To his surprise, he wasn't the only one who was looking nervous. Gellert didn't look as nervous as Albus felt, but still nervous.

"Hello." he said. Gellert looked at him in surprise, as though he had just noticed him. He probably had; he had a tendency to loose focus if nothing was happening of interest.

"Oh, Albus." he said. "How are you?"

"I've been alright, I suppose." Gellert nodded understandingly, most likely assuming something had happened with Ariana. "And yourself?"

"Fine, fine. Though Albus, when you told me you had something important to tell me, I decided there was something about me you should know as well. So I suppose we both have secrets to divulge today." he laughed lightly. Albus smiled, indulging him for a moment.

"Well, if that's the case, would you like to go first?" Truthfully, he was only procrastinating, seeing how much time he could put between now and when his secret would come out. Gellert laughed again.

"Oh no, Albus, this is your meeting! I think it only fits for you to say what's on your mind before I." he said, flashing him a smile. Albus gulped and looked down grass underneath his feet, the dirt from the mostly unused road next to him dusting his feet. There was no one around, no chance of being overheard, it wasn't even a horrible thing according to most people. So why couldn't he say it? He took a deep breath and looked back up at Gellert's face. He smiled encouragingly. If only he knew how much he wasn't helping...

"I..." he started, but his voice abandoned him. He cleared his voice and started again. "I... like men." he finally got out. He wanted to run, to get out of here before he heard the fated words fall from Gellert's lips, but he couldn't. He was rooted to the spot, staring into his face with what he knew must be a desperate look.

Gellert didn't seem to be able to decide on a single emotion. His face went from surprised to confused to encouraged to delighted. Albus was relieved; at least he wasn't upset. He seemed downright pleased.

"But Albus, it seems there aren't two secrets here today!" he exclaimed, positively beaming. Albus looked at him for a moment before it sunk in.

"You couldn't mean-"

"Yes, I as well! We have more in common than I thought." Albus should have been happy, delighted that he didn't have to worry about being rejected for who he was, but he was still skeptical.

"I've seen you walking down the street holding hands with some of the local girls." he pointed out, but Gellert simply waved it off.

"Albus, I may sound cruel now, but I never loved those girls. It was one-sided always. I've always loved-" but he stopped short, not saying the name. His cheeks turned a faint shade of red.

"Who?" Albus asked, curious and, if he was being honest with himself, a bit jealous.

"Well... I..." he didn't seem to be able to get it out. Albus couldn't imagine why. What was it he was- oh. Oh. Gellert must have seen the look of understanding cross his face because he turned redder and tried to force a laugh. "Yes."

"Do you know why I wanted to tell you about myself?" Albus asked, instead of giving an answer. Gellert shook his head, a question in his eyes. "I wanted you to know because if you hadn't been sent here for the summer, I may not have ever noticed my own preference." he was aware it sounded like he was just trying to get around saying 'I'm attracted to you', but essentially that was what he was doing. He wasn't sure why, but he didn't think he could say it so blatantly.

It only took Gellert a moment to understand. A wide smile crossed his face. "Your only saying that so I won't feel bad." he said, although it was obvious he didn't believe his own words.

"It's true." Albus assured him. "Those are my true feelings." Gellert didn't say or do anything for a moment. Finally, he reached out and cupped Albus's face with one hand and took a small step closer to him, his sky blue eyes never leaving Albus's deeper blue ones.

Albus knew what was coming, and his heart beat a bit harder in his chest. He wasn't sure what he thought; of course he didn't want Gellert not to kiss him, but was it wise to do so in the yard of a Muggle church, where they so resented people like him, even killed them? But Gellert's face was now so close to his own he could feel his breath and suddenly found it quite hard to care where they were. Gellert's eyes flickered down to his lips and back to his eyes, and he then closed the distance between them.

Albus's head was always racing. He was always thinking about something, questioning his surroundings, absorbing new information, which he supposed was why he was such a good student. But for once, it went mysteriously blank the moment Gellert's lips touched his own. His eyelids fluttered closed and he wrapped his arms around his neck. He would realize in the moments after the kiss that this was what he had always wanted, maybe even before he had known Gellert, to know that one person belonged to him and he to them. He would know that Gellert was someone he intended to be with for as long as he was allowed. He would feel elation that finally, he could be happy. But right now, he felt none of those things. Not yet. All he knew was that he never wanted Gellert to let him go.


End file.
